For those who have quick flashbacks to their own upbringing, to the holiday season upon us and the lighting of the hannukiah or decorating of the tree, or both, or others who have celebrated Kwaanza or any other Festivus for the rest of us... This time of year can bring such an amalgamation of feelings and memories, it always amazes, catches me off guard, and can even, heaven forbid, bring a sense of joy. At this time of year, in my practice, I always encourage my clients to allow themselves a time of introspection, to look back, review, revel, and release things that weigh them, tie them, or keep them stuck in this year as they prepare for the next to arrive. The same must hold true for me as well. You know, practice what you preach...
As well, I am able to see how the development and new amazing things that my daughter is encountering in her ever-expanding world can allow my wife and I to reexperience it all with her, see how she learns, enjoys, gets frustrated with, and then can master something in her world. Although it can be difficult for those of us who have some blocks to our memories from childhood due to whatever reasons, whether trauma, stress, or something else during that particular time frame, it's always awesome to be able to experience it all again, anew, through fresh and open eyes. So, keeping it sweet, and semi-short, here's wishing a great holiday season, and a time to be good to yourself and those around you!
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Monday, December 22, 2008
For anyone questioning whether to consider therapy:
The following is a great list I found through a colleague's website, and it really is for anyone considering whether they should seek out the assistance of a therapist - hope it helps you:
If you answer yes to any of these questions then I suggest you consider seeking professional help:
• Do you repeat the same patterns in relationships?
• Do you feel stuck?
• Do you ever think of hurting yourself? (Cutting, Suicide, etc.)
• Have you tried to stop a behavior, only to fail and ultimately feel worse?
• Do you ever have days when you feel like you can’t get out of bed?
• Have you lost your passion in life?
• Do feel that you never have found your passion?
• Do you struggle with body image issues?
• Do you struggle with sexual desire?
• Do you want to improve your relationships, romantic and platonic, but don’t know what to do or where to start?
• Do you avoid conflict, “people please”, or ignore your needs to meet the needs of others?
• Do you love your parents but feel guilty because you resent them, too?
• Are you having difficulty becoming a “grown-up”?
• Do you struggle with drug or alcohol abuse?
• Do you want to learn how to live in your integrity, be a genuine person, and be capable of loving and being loved?
• Do you become paranoid or insecure in relationships, only to end up sabotaging them or driving yourself crazy?
• Have ever been in a relationship with an addict/alcoholic?
• Have you ever experienced a trauma that has impacted your life in a significant way?
• Do you feel that you need help with the grieving process?
These are all issues that many people struggle with on a daily basis. You are not alone. You should not try to deal with these things alone. Help is available to you to deal with these issues and many more. For anyone who reads this, please comment if you would like me to reply, get in touch with you for a consultation or consideration about attending therapy, and we can discuss your specific needs. I am connected to a large network of clinicians and specialists. I have many resources that may be helpful to you. Let me help you navigate your path towards healing.
If you answer yes to any of these questions then I suggest you consider seeking professional help:
• Do you repeat the same patterns in relationships?
• Do you feel stuck?
• Do you ever think of hurting yourself? (Cutting, Suicide, etc.)
• Have you tried to stop a behavior, only to fail and ultimately feel worse?
• Do you ever have days when you feel like you can’t get out of bed?
• Have you lost your passion in life?
• Do feel that you never have found your passion?
• Do you struggle with body image issues?
• Do you struggle with sexual desire?
• Do you want to improve your relationships, romantic and platonic, but don’t know what to do or where to start?
• Do you avoid conflict, “people please”, or ignore your needs to meet the needs of others?
• Do you love your parents but feel guilty because you resent them, too?
• Are you having difficulty becoming a “grown-up”?
• Do you struggle with drug or alcohol abuse?
• Do you want to learn how to live in your integrity, be a genuine person, and be capable of loving and being loved?
• Do you become paranoid or insecure in relationships, only to end up sabotaging them or driving yourself crazy?
• Have ever been in a relationship with an addict/alcoholic?
• Have you ever experienced a trauma that has impacted your life in a significant way?
• Do you feel that you need help with the grieving process?
These are all issues that many people struggle with on a daily basis. You are not alone. You should not try to deal with these things alone. Help is available to you to deal with these issues and many more. For anyone who reads this, please comment if you would like me to reply, get in touch with you for a consultation or consideration about attending therapy, and we can discuss your specific needs. I am connected to a large network of clinicians and specialists. I have many resources that may be helpful to you. Let me help you navigate your path towards healing.
Updates at the end of one year, about to start anew...
A brief entry, from a looooong hiatus, reconsiderations for those just starting in the fatherhood field... My daughter is now 13 months old, sleeping (mostly) through the night, and currently struggling with sleeping during naps (2 x's only) in the day, and teething like it was going out of style! A hope, an aspiration for all of us out there, as our kids grow right before our eyes, and the responsibility for them grows, becomes more enriched, and the bond becomes ever deeper with them, we can only hope to keep up with the costs. Well, thanks to our current economy, who knows - all anyone can do is try to keep up, just not with the Joneses anymore. For yours truly, a full-time gig, plus an extra bit in the evenings can help, but as I've learned, beware of any online businesses touting making tons on the side for 5-10 hrs of work online each week. May as well be playing the lottery, for the odds might be just as good...Perhaps it's a skeptic speaking here, but just learning to be protective of funds, rather than just saying whatever - those days are long gone, the income too precious, and risk-taking takes the backseat to ensuring food on the table, a roof over the head, and clothes on our backs. Amen. I'll try to update entries a bit more frequently nowadays, with pertinent content to what might be sought by new dads...
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